i am not patti smith

this stream will change until it’s done writing me so if you like it check back later…

i am a big ball of fiery red consciousness weaving up and down the spinal column like an unreasonable thief at midnight. i am light where it turns to dark, right at the edge of the perineum, near the asshole, about halfway. i am the flax seed winding its way to my colon, spirling downwards through tubes of odious mass into a giant jetstream of awakening. i am that all-in-one new and improved molecule with no need for a social media plan because i’m already integrated into the network, netword-ing a future perfect tho never attainable tunnel through my brain and body all the time knowing that self is an a/illusion. i am a ripe temporal heart-felt belief that knows that, for the moment, everything is ok – i’m not going to slip into the abyss on this yoga mat next to the angular forlorn woman with flowing tie-dye pants and a modified bob during this noon-day class in SF. BTW, LOL, IMHO. this is who i am.

but i am not patti smith.

i am the lady in green who mumbles to self on 16th street in front of the pork store cafe incanting something rhythmic, as i pass her green visage, i click icons in space, hear the audio downstream of destruction, the sonic math of algorithms gone awry, the songs of the terrible streets, the overwrought but necessary sidewalks buzzing electric dead symphonies through the playa, anxious and dismayed yet lightened by the sun which is, today, finally shining down into the infinity of my collective despair at not being able to record my thoughts – a simple request it seems to me – to be able to record my thoughts, why can’t they, you know, with everything else that they’re doing these days, why can’t they figure out a way to let us record our thoughts as we think them, instantly, effortlessly, with a user friendly interface that’s easy to navigate, an app, why don’t they have an app to record thoughts so we dont have to wait until later to try to remember them and then to write them down, this is would be the next giant IPO, the really big one, i tell ya, the ancient chinese secret, the calgon take me away, the so good it hurts, and please, just give me an app to record my thoughts so i don’t have to go back to write them down later. this is who i am.

but i am not patti smith.

i am that smeared red gummy substance on guerrero in front of a non-descript apartment building, one i’ve passed a million times but for today, for the first time, saw the red smear and wondering about the smear and wondering if the smear wonders about me, about things, if the smear wants to take photos on the sly of the people who pass it each day and look down and wonder at the smear, does the smear wonder back. i am that smear.

but i am not, as i said before, i am not patti smith.

 

 

4 thoughts on “i am not patti smith

  1. Three comments:
    1) This would have been the perfect entry for our “Deep Poop Thoughts” notebook.
    2) I would SO buy that app to record my thoughts.
    3) You may be a lady in green, and you may not be Patti Smith, but I cannot agree that you are a smear of any sort.

    xo

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  2. hey xer. thank you for commenting. so, you agree that we could use a device to record our thoughts, right? i wonder what the implications of such a device would be? i mean, if we really had access to a tool to record our thoughts, and if it was in our control to choose when to turn that recorder on and when to turn it off, how would this change our thought process itself? undoubtedly, it would. it might make us much more aware of our thoughts! kind of like, when the video camera or voice recorder is turned on, we become much more aware of that which we are doing and saying and often have thoughts like “how do i look?” and “how do i sound?” it’s interesting, because meditation teaches us to “become aware of our thought process.” perhaps having this device would help us to achieve that. what do you think?

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    1. linda, I fantasize that this device would record our thoughts BEFORE the intrusion of any possible parts of our conscious mind that far too often considers things such as, “how do I look?” “how do I sound” or more specifically things like “what should I/ am I expected to say/think at this moment” .. . .. . . ? but this app you inspire me to feel, well, would be even better! a subconscious recorder to which we might refer to as a good friend who reminds us of our inspired passions or attitudes from years gone past…instead, I suppose, we must nurture our diligence to remember, perhaps record, and if we are lucky, to further nourish our lives based on these insights and downloads of utter incomprehensible wisdom!!!

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  3. leniqua. thanks so much for your post. you bring up such an interesting and important point of distinction…when will the thoughts be recorded BEFORE or AFTER our conscious mind intrudes/inserts commentary on our thoughts. in fact, it would be pretty cool if we could have an app that recorded our “thoughts” on different levels – subsconscious, preconscious and conscious. i’m very curious about the space between these different “states” and having a record of them would allow us to examine them and compare them. maybe the app could have a way to choose which level to record – ALL or just ONE stage at a time. it would be great if we could then export the digital recording into a software program where we could actually see the tracks of the different levels, to be able to isolate one at a time, to mix them up and to reuse them in some of our creative pieces.

    the second part of your response is so great. yes, let’s have an app that’s like a good friend who reminds us of our inspirted passions and attitudes of years gone past. yes, leniqua, that would truly be a super duper app. until then, i agree with your proposition that we must nurture our diligence to remember and nourish our lives based on tapping into that deep inner wisdom – the true core of what it is that is real and not illusory. to be lucky enough to touch it, if just momentarily, like that beautiful sliding fish that swims past our underwater human paws – grazing our flesh for only a moment before escaping upstream.

    thanks again for your post! xoxo

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